Life as we know it is a journey full of obstacles and tribulations, one trial after another. We accept this as just a common knowledge fact, without bothering to question it. Well, unless you are skeptical and question everything like I often do.
On Election Day 2016, I took an incredibly horrific panic attack, like many did that evening when Donald Trump became the 45th President. The week before I came out Transgender to my best friend of twenty years, it was one of the hardest things for me to do. I was worried that she would reject me as a person, as a friend, and go to lengths to ruin my life. I was pleasantly surprised when none of those things happened. Then Trump took office and everything got turned upside down.
From his first day in office to this day, being Trans has become a million times harder, especially in the South. I can lose my job, place to live, and even my life. The majority of trans women that have been murdered in recent years have lived in the South. Does it worry me? Yes, it does. Am I scared? Hell yes, I am. Do I believe that I’ll be added to the list of the Trans dead? Probably, I do live in the South, but I’m not going to let that stop me from being my true self.
A few weeks after Trump’s victory with the help of the Russians, I went to see my therapist. I wanted to start hormone therapy, and start the whole process of transitioning from male to female. However, my therapist decided to prove that she is nothing more than a bigot amongst many here in the Southern United States. She’d say things like “I’ll sent the prior authorization in and get you set up,” but nothing was ever done. Or she’d say things like “Transgender people don’t exist.” It’s been an endless battle for 3 years, 7 months, and 43 days.
It’s been a rough ride thus far, and I’m still fighting for what I feel I need in order to move forward with my life. After some very deep research into all of this, I have finally been able to make some forward progress in my goal to be the woman I am inside and have had to hide for so long. I won’t bore you with the details, but to say that it’s been a long time coming, and the road to this point has been painful, emotionally and mentally.